4:38 p.m.||||2004-05-21

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It was Josh's birthday Wednes but we are "celebrating" Sunday. After this next family debacle I will never follow the fucking family formula for birthdays again. I am so dreading this because I already know...we are black sheep, you know. It'll be about Josh but not really. It will be overstimulating, overlong, too many people crammed into a dinner no-one wants, followed by sugar blow-outs for each kid, followed by waiting to leave. Presents are good. It should be two hours - one for cake and playing and one for presents. These things go on all fucking day around here.

We are back to mean mother in law contemmpt . Just, my God, man. Too much. She's a bitter mean person. DAve goes thank goodness you love me cause my mom sho don't.

I got the blues.

I got fifteen minutes to go.

My son, three.

I tell ya.