1:16 p.m.||||2001-12-02
Uugghhh. Hungry. Pain...in...side...like gall bladder, only undiagnosed. It sucks that I drank so much when I was younger because I've never been right since. It sucks also when I put too much oregano in the spaghetti because it makes me too paranoid to think of looking for a job. I imagine one, and then I'm already there, working a double, shouting out commands at lazy asses, getting angry and suicidal when I try to see the future in it. And so I eat more spaghetti.
My son this morning is interested only in tossing things from the table-top - as he has just learned to release! I keep saying, now that toy, honey , if you drop it on the side where mommy's sitting is much more likely to be retrieved by mommy. He grins at me like Spanky from Lil Rascals.
I'm sitting here in my underwear in Dave's mom's dining room (she's gone; we're house-sitting) and across the way a girl is hanging Christmas lights - there are no blinds drawn, nor are the curtains closed....I don't think she can see me, if so, weird. That's the same house with the evil dog who's bitten both D's mom and sister. The same house where they lovingly foster a buncha kids and that dog stands guard over them all. They'd be nice to know, maybe, if it weren't for the dog. I stepped onto the porch for a smoke yesterday and they were all out, including dog, and all looked at me like I had a third ear. I made it a quick one.